FLARE AND BACK AGAIN

Taking Back Monday: Drama-Free by Choice

20 Sep 2010 1 Comment

by PMT in Living With RA

“Today is the greatest
Day I’ve never known
Can’t wait for tomorrow
I might not have that long…”

–Smashing Pumpkins, “Today”

I love this song.  Yeah, it’s about drugs…I think.  Well, that is what my brother says.  I don’t really know.  What I do know is that regardless of what the song’s real meaning is, the chorus serves as a poignant reminder for me; for us all. 

Mondays: You Got to Love Them. 

We all have “those” days that seem to be generally more stressful  than others.    It’s not necessarily always Monday, it can be any day when things just don’t go as smoothly as they should.  They are usually days when we are at our most vulnerable; either coming out or just going into a flare.  The universe seems to use these days to test our resolve to see if maybe this time, we won’t succumb to the stress that we all know makes us sick… Maybe this time, we won’t need to be right, have the last word, or care deeply.  Maybe this time we can forgive the idiots and jerks that surround us and accept that they cannot help themselves.  Maybe this time we will forgive ourselves for simply being human….

Maybe, but not likely (LOL).  After all, we, the afflicted, who feel a little bit more than the average person, tend to have a more difficult time just letting things go….

(To all my Canadian readers, an ode to Mondays from The Kids in the Hall.<3)

I always know the universe has come to call when I wake up to texts from my ex…he seems to live for conflict and derision.  Anyway, I hadn’t heard from him in two months, and today is the best I have felt in the last two weeks, so of course today would be the day he texts.    Anyway, today, unlike so many other days in the past, I caught on to what was happening.  I saw that I was being tested, and rather than allowing myself to be swept down the path of stress, anger, and subsequent pain, I stopped and decided that today…..today,  I would choose which path I would take.  After all, today is only here for a limited time.  It is too short to squander it on people and things that don’t make a damn bit of difference. 

Life presents us with unpleasant people and situations all the time, but how we choose to receive them is entirely up to us.  I could have, like so many times in the past, played “toss the turd” with my ex.  I could have engaged in the foolish and petty back and forth, that changes nothing except the level of pain in my joints.  Power over my emotions  is power over this disease.  The last person I want at the control switch of my pain is my ex, or the inconsequential guy who cut me off on the freeway, or the bill collector, or my boss, or anybody else aside from my self. Today, along with tomorrow and the day after, and the next day will all be good days because I declare them all to be drama-free.  They may not all be ideal and sometimes there will be days where I will have a reason to feel angry or sad, but I will cross that bridge when I come to it. I will decide where my energy is invested.

Life is too short and our health is much too important to allow anyone or anything take our peace, our joy, and our day from us.  <3